Death by Multivariable Calculus, and Texas Two-Steppin'

My new experience for this week was eating is West Quad. It wasn't very good. South Quad definitely has the best food.

I took my psych exam yesterday. It was ok but it could've been better. I knew most of it but some things I had to guess or bs my way through.

Speaking of psych, I was a subject in a research thing this afternoon. All I had to do was read a poem and answer some questions. Fun stuff. I actually was done by at the time I was supposed to have started it (because I got there early).

I was eating dinner by myself, deep in thought, when Shalako joined me and brought me back to reality. Shalako and Jenny have really been putting things into perspective for me lately. I mean, I think I've got it bad with all this homework and stuff to do and stuff I don't understand and exams, and then there's Shalako with more things taking up his time than I can imagine and Jenny with those hard classes. I have calc. Ooo, big deal. One hard class. One stressful exam. And if I would just give it the time it deserves instead of being lazy, it would be much easier. But no. I just can't manage to do that.

There are other things though that are stressing me out. I wanted to be a math minor, but I can't seem to justify it anymore. At times I suck it up and tell myself that I'm just going to do it and like it, but other times I realize that it simply is not worth it. The classes I wanted to take to get my math minor have math 217 (linear algebra) as a pre-req, but I wasn't planning to take that class. And it's more complicated than just deciding that I'm going to take the class, there's more to it than that. Also, all I wanted was to get A's this semester, but calc is not looking like it will be anywhere near an A. I've gotten around the average on the homework and this exam probably will not be good. Then there's psych which is supposed to be easy, but my first paper wasn't an A (close, but not) and I definitely had to pull some stuff out of my butt for the exam. Plus, I was thinking about doing some study abroad stuff during the summer of '07, but the only German summer one is open only for people who would be taking 5th, 6th, or 7th semester German and by then I'd be past that.

So, in conlusion, I'm upset because my plans are going awry and my goals are not being met. I didn't really have any goals last year or really even much in high school, and when there was something I really wanted to get or accomplish, it hardly ever happened. Now the process is repeating itself. I did make goals this semester and I did make plans for my future recently (which everyone seems to think I need to be doing). The only thing that comes out of goals and plans for me is falling short and failure.

Ok, now for some non-depressing news. I definitely went to a barn dance tonight. It was incredibly fun! There were square dances and line dances and another dance thing and, at the end, there was the Texas two-step. I had various dance partners throughout the night, and the last guy I danced with was from from Perth, Australia. The whole night was so fun! It was better than last year because last year I hardly even got to dance with a male, but this time I danced with guys all but once. There was a bonfire too, but I didn't hang around there much. My night ended when I was driven back to my dorm by two random guys I had never met before. It was a great night! Ahh, good times. I love Cru... the people are great.

Gotta rest up for the game tomorrow!