Absolutely Nothing Ever

Phase 10 is fun, but it leaves one wondering, "does Ross have a brain?" (that's Alecia's lovely quote). I'm sure Ross has a brain... somewhere. (I'm just joking around, Ross)...

Saturday night, Ross, Alecia, and I went to Saginaw and watched The Wedding Date. Alecia and I liked it and we're pretty sure Ross did too. On Sunday, Alecia, Ross, Levi, and I went out for Chinese after church. It was as good as usual.

I went to the band festival on Friday and Saturday and watched the senior and junior bands. Surprisingly, it was more sad watching the junior band play than the senior band. I guess it showed me how old I am. I remember being in jr. high and being in the junior band and it doesn't feel like it was that long ago, but it was 5-6 years ago. Six years is a long time. I was talking to Jake about the junior band's uniforms and how we got them new when I was in 7th grade. He was like, "wow, I didn't know they were that old," and I was like, "they're only 6... or 7... years old......" Watching all those little whipper-snappers run around and scream and wait excitedly for their rating was tough. I remember when I was one of those kids. The feelings that resulted from watching senior band weren't as poignant or intense... I've already had many encounters with the "leaving high school" feelings. I guess the junior band brought out a new perspective which elicited new thoughts and emotions.

My printer needs new ink or something. The colors are messed up.

I spent today doing nothing and mostly enjoying it. Maybe tomorrow I'll do more of nothing... or maybe I'll do something. I can't wait until this semester is over.

Cognitive Dissonance

There was more humor in physics today. Professor Clarke was demonstrating something with a toy called the "Astro Blaster", which is basically four balls on a stick. You drop it with the biggest ball down and it launches the top ball. Well, he dropped it and the top ball went flying at the ceiling, hit the white pull-down projection screen thing, went behind it, and then reappeared as it fell into the waste basket. It was humorously impressive. Also, I was sitting in a 5-seat row and there were two guys to my left and one to my right. About 35 minutes into the lecture I happened to glance at them and they were all sleeping.

I had one exam and one oral test today. I don't know how they went... hopefully o.k.

Relient K is so overrated. Seriously.

It's kind of funny that a postage stamp costs more than a blue book.

Whenever I have a ton of homework, I wish and wish that I could just relax. But now that I have basically nothing to do, I don't like it. I wouldn't mind relaxing at home, but it feels pointless to be at college and to not be doing anything.

I like to know "how", but I like to know "why" more. I want to know people's motives. I want to know what makes people tick. I don't like to come right out and ask what I'm wondering... I like to work around it. Someday soon I'm going to take a step back from my life and figure out who I am. Someone whom I trust once told me to stop and figure myself out, but I never really did, although I have been playing with the subject ever since that person suggested it. What defines me? Who am I really? What are my motives for doing the things I do and being the way I am? Why do I like the things I like? Is it really me who likes those things or do I "like" them because I set some weird goal for myself long ago that I never really knew I made but which I could never let go of?

Anyways...

Today is Vanessa's birthday! ...And only 13 hours until spring break!

Forfeit Everything

This morning was so sunny and the sky was so blue that it felt like Friday. It's cloudy now, but this morning was really pretty.

We had a substitue in calc today. I liked her better than Elmas Irmak. We started parametric equations and it was nice to have someone who spoke English as a first language teaching it... I was hoping it would be Jani though.

Campus band was normal tonight. Mr. Talley was being rather mean and sarcastic. He's usually pretty mean in like a semi-serious yet joking and humorous way, not scary-mean. He wasn't scary mean today but he was more serious and less joking when he was being mean. But he's really not mean... mean is a bad word for it. One time today he was conducting and someone was tapping their foot really loud and it totally screwed up his conducting. Then when we got to the slow song, it turned out that it was the sax soloist and Talley was like, "do you have steal-toed shoes on or something?", and then he went on and on about the tapping of feet. ...Talley did a lot of apologizing tonight.

Spring break is in 40 hours!

Almost There

Today was funny... kind of. In physics, the lecturer almost got hit in the head by a rocket-propelled empty 2-liter bottle of coke. That was the funniest part of the day. First, he pressurized the bottle and let it go and it only went a few feet up. But then he put "about 20 cc's" of water in it, pressurized it, and let it go and it flew up quickly, hit the ceiling, and came flying back down at his head. If nothing else, at least his demonstrations are funny and interesting.

Reading Job for Great Books is not fun. Well, I didn't actually read it, but listening to the lecture and the discussion is not fun. There is this kid in my discussion who is set on the fact that God is not perfect, not omniscient, and not omnipotent. When my discussion section was discussing the meaning of the word "curse", as in "Job did not curse God", my GSI said something weird: "It's not "curse" meaning to swear, like saying 'damn you, God' or 'Go to hell, God', but it's (blah blah blah)." I thought the telling God to go to hell was, um, interesting.

You know that you're seriously procrastinating when you start clicking on the advertisements (or playing the games in the ads). You know you're procrastinating when you check your email for the 5th time in an hour and then you start to clean it out and organize it. You know you're procrastinating when you start looking at prices for the birthday present of someone whose birthday is months away. You know you're procrastinating when, every other minute, you check AIM, yahoo, and MSN messenger for people to talk to. You know that you're procrastinating when you read people's away messages for the 10th time when you know they haven't changed. You know that you're procrastinating when you're writing about ways to procrastinate in your blog. And yes, I have done all of these this evening.

On my calc midterm, I got full credit on 3 out of the 9 problems. I was (and still am) very proud of my 3 full-credits. The one was worth 18 points, another was worth 16, and the last was 6 points. I got over half of my total points in those three problems (one-third of the test).

...And then there's my crazy delusions of grandeur, but we won't go into that.

Spring break starts in 60 hours!

Yay for birthdays!

Today was a good day. First of all, it's my birthday! People made me feel so special today. Alison and Amanda IMed me in the morning and wished me a happy birthday and Steve IMed me in the afternoon and wished me a happy birthday, but I have no idea how he knew it was my birthday. Then during German, Ross called me... he seems to have a knack for calling me during classes or exams. I couldn't figure out why he'd be calling me, I even thought it might be his mother calling to ask if I was going with them on Friday, but when I called him back, he said he had called to wish me a happy birthday... makes sense. When I got to my room, there was a sign on the door from Erin that said, "Happy Birthday, Sarah". Then after lunch, I stopped by Alison's room to say hi and she had a card and a present for me, and I was not expecting that at all. When I was picking up my package from the west lobby, Jenny and Jen wished me a happy birthday, and later Priya and Vanessa did too. My dad called during lunch and left a message on my phone and my grandmother also called me. Alecia sent me two e-cards. I'm 19! Ok, enough about that... I'm sure I sufficiently bored you by now.

On top of all of that, I didn't fail my calc midterm! I even got above average, well, not too much above average (6 points) but still above average. That made me very happy.

I hate alarm clocks because I hate high pitched beeping and sudden loud noises. I've also given up on sleeping. It just doesn't work anymore. I lay there and toss and turn, as tired as can be, but I just can't fall asleep. And when I do get to sleep, I don't want to stop. So right now I'm tired, but I don't want to go to bed because it's simply a miserable time.

My evening was spent looking at calc, trying to do the homework, listening to RadioU, and watching Stargate. It was fun stuff.

There are less than 4 days until spring break!... only 1 paper, 1 exam, and 1 calc homework assignment until I get to leave! Woohoo!

Who likes pink flamingos?

I got up for church early this morning after only 6 hours of sleep. My plan was to get 8 hours but one can not control the idiocy of one's hallmates or the stupidness of one's roommate. Church was cool though, definitely worth it. It's not as boring as home and the sermons have been almost or just as interesting as the speakers' messages were at camp.

Only less than 5 days, less than 120 hours until I get to go home for wonderful spring break! I can not wait. There's just 1 midterm, 1 paper, 1 calc assignment, 1 quick German quiz, and a few German assignments until I get to leave. Everyone I have talked to is excited for spring break and ready to go somewhere that is not Ann Arbor. Don't get me wrong, Ann Arbor is a great place, but staying in any one place for an extended period of time can become tedious.

This is my quiz: How many random facts about Sarah do you know? Take my quiz!
http://www.quizyourfriends.com/yourquiz_IM.php?quizname=050219171212-695342

RadioU is hot. I love RadioU. Columbus, OH, is ok too (that's where RadioU comes from).

I watched Goodbye Lenin today for German. It was pretty good, but some things were not resolved well. I still think it's weird that they require us to watch these R-rated, explicit movies, just because it's so different than the stuff we could watch in high school.

That is all.

Please hear what I am not saying.

I have good news and not so good news. Let's start with the not so good...

The calc midterms are not fully graded yet, but I don't think I did well. We went over the first half in class today and I know that I got two 8-pointers wrong and a couple 2-pointers. Maybe I'll get partial credit for the 8-pointers... maybe. Maybe the curve will keep me from failing... maybe. It's very discouraging and it makes the decisions about my future even more difficult to make.

Now for the good news. I got a letter from the office of the registrar today. This is what it said: "On behalf of the University, it is my pleasure to inform you that you are a recipient of the William J. Branstrom Freshman Prize. This award is given annually to first year undergraduate students whose academic achievement during their first semester on campus places them in the upper five percent of their college class." It went on from there. That took me completely by surprise... I was totally not expecting it.

I want to tell people because I'm excited but I don't want to seem like I'm showing off my achievements. No one likes it when people are constantly displaying or telling about their achievements. If one of my friends did something great and told me, I'd be really happy for them. But I always have to be so careful about what I say and do here and elsewhere, perhaps more than other people. I can't tell people about the things that bother me or what I don't like because then they'll think I'm whiney and easily annoyed and what not. I can't be sarcastic or blunt (like I am) because then they'll think I'm mean and a horrible person when that is not my intention. I can't be openly happy or excited because then they'll think I'm weird or childish or, in this case, self-centered. I have to suppress myself here at college more than anywhere else... but maybe not completely anymore.

So this letter that I got almost makes me more depressed about my calc exam. I was doing so well and now it's ruined. If I hadn't been doing well, I'd have nothing to lose... but I did have something to lose and now it's gone.

The following song has been one of my favorites for a while.

Hold It Up To The Light
Smalltown Poets

It's the choice of a lifetime, I'm almost sure
I will not live my life in between anymore
If I can't be certain of all that's in store
This far it feels so right.
I will hold it up, hold it up to the light,
Hold it up to the light, hold it up to the light.

The search for my future has brought me here.
This is more than I'd hoped for, but sometimes I fear
That the choice I was made for will someday appear
And I'll be too late for that flight.
So hold it up, hold it up to the light,
Hold it up to the light, hold it up to the light

I said God, will you bless this decision?
I'm scared. Is my life at stake?
But I know if you gave me a vision
Would I never have reason to use my faith?

Now as soon as I'm moving my choice is good.
This way comes through right where I prayed that it would.
If I keep my eyes open and look where I should
Somehow all of the signs are in sight.
If I hold up the light.

It's too late to be stopped at the crossroads,
Each life here and each a possible way.
But wait and they all will be lost roads;
Each path's growing shorter the longer I stay.

I was dead with deciding, afraid to choose.
I was mourning the loss of the choices I'd lose,
But there's no choice at all if I don't make my move
And trust that the timing is right.
I will hold it up, hold it up to the light,
Hold it up to the light, hold it up to the light.

Dilemma and indecision. Maybe I'll end up living in a trailer park waiting outside the gas station for the next batch of lottery tickets to come in. That's a semi-quote from Boy Meets World, by the way. I doubt one bad calc exam will result in that, but you never know... you never know how one small decision will change the course of your life. "Anything can change a life that's ready to be changed."

The Road Not Taken
Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Cru was cool and good tonight. After Cru, I went with a bunch of people to get ice cream and then we watched The Notebook in Tracy's room. It was really sad but really good. I didn't cry though... I was afraid that I would, but I didn't.

You talk to me but you don't say anything.

I've seen Mike Dittenber two days in a row: yesterday on my way back from East Hall and Wednesday on my way to the Ugli from Mason Hall.

So my calc exam didn't go as well I would have liked, but it might not be as bad as I think either, especially if there is a curve. I had to take it in the professors office... I must've been the only one who needed an alternate time.

My physics homework was finished in possibly a record time today. That was encouraging.

Bible study tonight was really great. It was just a really good time. The people there were all so unique and fun and special. Each of them brought something great... all the stories and laughing and talking and laughing and discussing... the time flew by. I think that it was the most I've ever laughed since I've been at college. They are all so admirable and unique and great, but I could never tell them that face to face. So if any of you people out there reading this go to Tian and Briana's bible study, know that I appreciate, value, and recognize the quality and significance of each of you.

FYI, I like to quote things... songs, speeches, commercials, movies, whatever. I find that others have a natural knack for putting my thoughts and feelings into words. I am a quoter.

That is all for tonight. One week until spring break. I can not wait. Ten points to whoever can tell me where the following quote is from.

"If it is your goal, strive for it, and don't regret later that you didn't do all you could to get there."

Rain, rain on my face.

Last night I was walking back from Starbucks in the rain. At first I didn't mind the rain, but I wasn't exactly enjoying it either. When I got near the Union and West Quad, I lifted my face towards the sky and let the rain run down my face instead of trying to keep my face dry, and that actually made the rain much more enjoyable.

Assonance always gets me.

Like, when they are calling off names when they're handing back papers, I always jump when I hear "Derrick" or "Gary" or anything with "air" near the beginning of it.


Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

-William Shakespeare


"These two snowblowers are identical, but the one on the right has a lower price. See, a lower price beats a high one every time"

Valentine's day is stupid.

Es gibt am Mittwoch eine große Prüfung in Calulus. Ich muss studieren.

Words of the day:
-amnesty - A general pardon granted by a government, especially for political offenses.
-animosity - Bitter hostility or open enmity; active hatred. A hostile feeling or act.
-epitome - A representative or example of a class or type. A brief summary, as of a book or article; an abstract.

You want a fun oxymoron?

How about "Mennonite power!"?

My day began at 7:45am to the tune of some song that my cell phone is programmed to play. Because my alarm clock is broken, I've been forced to use my cell phone as an alarm. The reason I got up so early was so that I could attend church... the same church that Jenny goes to. So we walked to the cube around 9ish and got into a van. A few minutes later, Craig, Shalako, and Denise (???) came and joined us in the big white van. Then we made stops around campus: east quad for one person (Pearl), the hill for two people, and north campus for no one, and then we went to Huron Hills Baptist Church. When I walked in, a lady commented on my Goshen College sweatshirt which I was wearing. It was fun that people actually knew about Mennonites. Then we had sunday school and I met Kat and Luke. The church service was next and it was different but it wasn't anything I hadn't seen before. I kind of reminded me of the Methodist church in Au Gres when I went there one time when I was in jr. high. After church, another person (possibly the guest speaker) commented on my Goshen College sweatshirt and he said that he was an anabaptist. So that was cool. And that was my morning.

This afternoon I had the best of intentions to do homework and study for my calc midterm. But when I tried to study for calc, I couldn't think straight because I was so tired, and so I went back to my room and took a 3-hour nap. By the time I got up, it was time for dinner, and so I ate dinner while watching TV.

It's officially been over one week since I've talked to any of my friends from home (excluding Vanessa). Ross has called me a couple times but I was never around when he called. It's sad. But now I'm talking to Ross, so that's good, but it was still over a week.

I must do something productive now.

Happiness lies in the offline messages.

Maybe I'm a romantic, an idealist. Maybe I'm a cynic... I have been told that I am. I don't know exactly what I am. I was thinking about this because I was watching Ever After and was thinking about how much I like idealistic romantic movies like Ever After, The Wedding Planner, 10 Things I Hate About You, Kate and Leopold, You've Got Mail, and others. Maybe I'm a hopeless romantic... maybe.

I enjoy reading previous journal entries of mine. It's fun to see what I was thinking and remember past events and feelings.

I had dinner with Jenny tonight. That was fun. Beyond that, not much has happened today. I tried to do homework but ended up reading one section in physics because it looked interesting even though it wasn't assigned, and then I read one of the 9 sections which were assigned and gave up. I guess reading physics during commercials isn't the most effective way to go about it. Another accomplishment of today was cleaning out my umich inbox. That took like 45 minutes.

On a very sad note, my alarm clock died tonight. I was trying to set it for tomorrow morning and the hour button broke when I was at 3am. Now what am I going to do?

There were a lot of "love" movies on today... and I watched three of them, but that is not the point. It took me a while to realize that there were more romantic movies than normal, and then it took me even longer to realize that that was probably due to Valentine's day being in two days. Wow, I'm a quick one.

Also, my work ethic is pretty much nonexistant.

Word of the day:
-pious - Having or exhibiting religious reverence; earnestly compliant in the observance of religion; devout. Professing or exhibiting a strict, traditional sense of virtue and morality; high-minded. Commendable; worthy.

Invisible To Everyone

I succesfully failed my calc quiz today. I'll be lucky to get a 50%.

What should I talk about? What should I write about? What should I do? Where should I go? What will happen if I don't? So many questions, so many more questions than that. Where can I find the answers?

Maybe this that I see as the bane of my existance is really a blessing... a very oddly shaped one perhaps, but nonetheless for the best.

If you spell "bane" as "bain" then it means "a bath; a bagnio" (a bagnio being possibly a public bathhouse). Ever faithful Dictionary.com taught me that.

It's nice to get little unexpected things from people, such as a little note or something. Even comments on blogs are nice to see and read... proof that I am important enough for someone to take the time and see what I have to say... proof that I just might be appreciated somewhere, somehow.

My evil roommate is really getting on my nerves. I don't know what her problem is, but if she has a problem with me or what I do, I'd rather have her tell me directly than have her make supposedly innocent comments with the obvious intent of bitching at me or Steph without direct confrontation. And if she doesn't want to approach us up front, then I wish she would shut her face and stay the hell out of my life. I'm so sick of her snide comments. I'm so sick of her superior attitude. I can't wait until this semester is over if only because I will never have to see her again.

I'm sorry. It's a heated subject in this room between me and Steph. I had to censor much of what I was thinking about her, much of what I wanted to write, the rage I wanted to get off my chest. You don't know how much I just want to blow-up at her.

Menis.

Word of the day:
diatribe - a bitter, abusive denunciation.

- Insert Clever Title Here -

I went to the math lab this afternoon and a professor named Aleksei Koresnikov helped me. He was quite helpful and fun and his accent wasn't bad at all. I ended up feeling a little like an idiot though because I had to display my lack of algebra proficiency.

So, I'm obsessed with weird online quizzes. Seriously. So far this week I've been labeled as Apollo (the greek god), avid band member, Simba, Ariel, fall, Johnny Depp's Icabod Crane, slap_j (you probably won't understand that one), in love with Viggo Mortenson, Faramir, Hermione Granger, Daniel Jackson (from Stargate), Mountain Dew Code Red, the Marines, Urania (one of the greek muses), Drew (from Switchfoot), and the USA. Plus, I've taken many many more before this and I was labeled as Athena, Caroling Jimmy, a good friend, my match is Brad Pitt, my new years resolution is to incite a revolution through my art, sneaky villain, crispy m&m, casual user (of computers), carl, Linus, Mouse on Mars, Nala, Zorilla, tape dispenser, Susie Carmichael, Stone Cold, outsider, Frodo, Chuckie Finster, Maybelline, Spiderman, American Eagle, scottish fold (it's a type of cat), cheer bear, ivory truffles, jack the ripper, jedi knight, pocketwatch, rabies, Regis Philbin, robocop, stupid, apple pie, casual, chocolate kisses, an emotional drunk, logic smarts, a lazy-eyed psycho, and more. If you read all that, know that I'm am very impressed and grateful.

My roommate's boyfriend is here and it's only 10:30 and he's already asleep. He went to bed around 9ish. He's been coming here and staying here alot this semester. It's a little inconvenient, but as we all know, the world does not revolve around me... I am not nearly massive enough to have that kind of gravitational force. (Yes, I am learning stuff in physics).

Today was a weird day of seeing random people everywhere. First, I saw Marwan randomly in East Hall. Then I saw Tian and Erin in rapid succession, and I've never seen Tian going to class, so it was a big thing. After that, it was Dan and Bob and then Alison in the bathroom and then some people in the elevator. It was all like "whoa".

"I ain't got much else to lose"

Professor Clarke (physics lecturer) always seems to extend the due date for the homework that I can do and never for the homework that I can't do.

Today I had to select a room for next year. I went down to "club 600" where they were doing the south quad room assignments a few minutes early just in case, and I ended up waiting for 30 minutes (20 minutes longer than I was supposed to). It was an agonizing 30 minutes. I talked to the person sitting next to me who happened to be the number right before me. We were both annoyed at the whole process. When it was finally my turn, I asked for my first choice and the guy said it wasn't available. So I was about to move on when he said something about that the housing people had put a hold on the room and that he would just move the hold to a different room. So he did and signed me and Steph up for our first choice. Hopefully nothing bad will happen because he did that.

I spent 1.5-2.5 hours working on my calc last night and I only got two problems done. It wasn't frustrating though because I ended up getting the right answers on the first or second try. It just took awhile to learn the method of how to do the problems. A CD came with my book that has some people doing examples from the book on it (like they talk and explain the steps and you watch the steps being done), and that was helpful. It was kind of like the stuff I had to do on the internet last year in AP calc. Calc is fun... I like calc. I wonder why I like math so much.

I hate how a perfectly fine day can be ruined so quickly. I hate how I'm forced to bottle up every true feeling I ever have. I hate that I'm going to regret today tomorrow.

Life is hard; get a pillow.

Speaking of pillows, I like my pillows. They're not exactly quality pillows, but we have a history together.

I really need to get off the computer and start working on my calc. I've been on the computer for a good portion of the day. So much for getting ahead.

"When the beating of your heart echoes the beating of the drums, there is a life about to start when tomorrow comes."

"How can I ever face my fellow man? How can I ever face myself again? My soul belongs to God, I know. I made that bargain long ago. He gave me hope when hope was gone. He gave me strength to journey on."

"I know a place where no one's lost. I know a place where no one cries. Crying at all is not allowed, not in my castle on a cloud."

Who knows where those three selections of song lyrics come from and what their titles are? They are three of my favorites.

I have nothing else to say at the moment. Goodnight. Good day.

Words of the day:
-torrent - A turbulent, swift-flowing stream. A heavy downpour; a deluge. A heavy, uncontrolled outpouring.
-sentimentality - The quality or condition of being excessively or affectedly sentimental. A sentimental idea or an expression of it.
-stoic - One who is seemingly indifferent to or unaffected by joy, grief, pleasure, or pain. Seemingly indifferent to or unaffected by pleasure or pain; impassive.
-readily - In a prompt, timely manner; promptly. In a cooperative manner; willingly. In a manner indicating or connoting ease; easily.

I like purple scents.

I really do. At the moment, my deodorant, air freshener, shampoo, conditioner, and B&BW body splash are all purple scents. Sometimes I have a purple body wash scent too, but not right now... it's pink right now.

Good news! I found out how to pronounce my physics discussion professor's name: Ctirad Uher (Steer-ott You-er). Also, he might actually be Czech instead of Russian, and when you search for "Ctirad" on google, the first thing that comes up is about my professor. But that's not the actual good news. We got our physics exams back today and I didn't fail! I got 16/20 (above average!). Normally that would be a B- but for this exam it is a B/B+... so I'm happy. He wrote "Solid!" under my score.

My plans for last night were thwarted by Stephanie's boyfriend, Nick. He wanted to watch the Super Bowl, so instead of a relaxing evening with Extreme Home Makeover and Desperate Housewives, I was stuck listening to German news on the internet. And the only good thing that came out of that was that I got my homework done, but then it wasn't even due today.

I frequently have to remind myself, "You may feel ahead of the game, but you're not... you're not even close. Finish your calc, physics, and great books, and then we'll talk." It's funny that I feel like I have so little to do now that I'm not bogged down and overwhelmed. It's funny that on top of things or not behind feels like being ahead.

More good news! I motivated myself so much that I am now done with my physics homework. Good times, good times.

Stupidly enough, last night I set my alarm for 8pm instead of 8am. Luckily, Nick was loud and accidentally woke me up. When I went to bed last night, first I had forgotten to set my alarm, and then after I set it I wasn't sure if it was on, and then I wondered if I had set it for p.m. instead of a.m... and sure enough, the one I didn't double check was the one that I had actually done.

Word of the day:
-colloquial - characteristic of or appropriate to the spoken language or to writing that seeks the effect of speech; informal. Relating to conversation; conversational.

What is your fear?

This weekend, although fun and relaxing, was not as productive as I needed it to be. I didn't do a thing except read one book of the Aeneid on the way back to Ann Arbor. Oh well. I'm complacent in my studies... but I'm really not. It's more of a passive acceptance of my fate.

I did accomplish some things though. My most notable accomplishment was watching the cast commentaries of the extended versions of The Two Towers and The Return of the King. I enjoyed every second of it... and there were quite a few. I've already seen the cast commentary for The Fellowship of the Ring twice, so I didn't watch that one this time. On Saturday night, I went to Tawas and watched Coach Carter with Alecia and Ross. I thought it was good. Geoffery Farver and some other people were there too. Alecia, Ross, and I played Uno-Rummy-Up Saturday afternoon, and that was fun. I enjoy that game. We also played Punch Line and that was interesting. I had a 123 point word: jiggler. After the movie we played Dutch Blitz, and I've officially come to the conclusion that that game is more fun with four people instead of three. It goes too slow with three. After that we played Phase 10 and that was really fun, or at least I enjoyed it a lot.

Today in church there was a new guy named Levi. He seemed pretty cool. He is 20 years old, an ex-Amish from the Hale area, has an 8th grade education, and was kicked in the face by one of the cows that he milks every morning. It would be nice if he continued to come and it would be nice if we (or they, considering I'm not really around much) could include him in some of the fun social stuff we/they do, since he doesn't know anyone around here.

I'm not watching the Super Bowl. I really couldn't care less who wins. Well, that's not entirely true... I do prefer the Patriots over the Eagles, but I don't care enough to watch it.

I really have to study for tomorrow's German test and do my German homework.

Oh, and by the way, the quote in my first paragraph in the previous post was from The Fellowship of the Ring, if you didn't know. I believe Boromir yelled it to Frodo after he tried to take the ring and then Frodo ran away.

Physics Immersion

After three full days of studying and preparation, the big event is finally over. Yes, that horrendous hour and a half bit of scheduled torture where "you will beg for death before the end", that which can only be called the physics midterm. Did the 15 (or more) hours of studying pay off? I don't know. Twenty multiple choice questions in 90 minutes... it could go either way. I'm just hoping to pass. If nothing else, I now know what it means to study... I was drowning in physics and now I can finally breathe again.

Now if I can just finish my calc homework before tomorrow.

That physics exam really put me behind in every other class. I'm 8 books behind on the Aeneid for great books, a couple homework assignments behind in German, my calc homework is left unfinished, and I haven't practiced my flute all week. Arg. I'll be doing a bit of catching up this weekend... at home.

That is all for now. Time to sleep.

My First February Post

I could not see well today. I don't know why... everything was blurrier than usual... blurrier than last week even. I ended up squinting at the words in the great books lecture and squinting at the numbers in the physics lecture. Today progressively got worse, and the eyesight problem was just the beginning. The physics lecture just made me afraid of the exam. Calc was annoying because the professor does the examples so fast that I don't even have time to process what is going on. German was dumb and I didn't like it, but we didn't have to turn in the homework that I didn't do, so that was good. Lunch was good but then I almost fell asleep during the great books discussion. This semester has not been a good one so far. Every day I look forward to the time when I get to sit in front of my computer and hope someone is online to talk to.

But hanging out with people in person is even better than hanging out online, and tonight I met Tian at the Starbucks on South U and we talked for a while. It was quite enjoyable and it was wonderful to get away from the depths of physics hell.

Good news! I finished my physics homework that is due tomorrow at 11p.m. and I did it almost entirely by myself.

These are the some of the most popular types of Christmas trees (note that Douglas Fir is one of them):
Arizona Cypress
Balsam Fir
Colorado Blue Spruce
Canaan Fir
Concolor Fir (White Fir)
Douglas-Fir
Eastern Redcedar
Eastern White Pine
Fraser Fir
Grand Fir
Leyland Cypress
Noble Fir
Norway Spruce
Scotch Pine
Virginia Pine
White Spruce

Words of the day:
-balmy - mild and pleasant. "It was a balmy 30 degrees today."
-pipe dream - a fantastic notion or vain hope.